Practical ways to stay close to tweens and teens, make memories, and enjoy time together as they grow.
When our grandchildren are little, spending time together can be pretty simple. A few games, a craft project, a trip to the playground, or an afternoon baking cookies can fill an entire day.
But as they get older, things change.
Suddenly, their weekends are filled with sports, school activities, friends, and other commitments. The things they enjoyed when they were younger don’t always interest them anymore, and finding time together can take a little more planning.
My husband and I are also raising our 9-year-old grandson, so we’re balancing the responsibilities of raising a child while trying to stay involved in the lives of our older grandchildren.
I know we’re not the only grandparents in this situation.
One thing I’ve learned is that staying connected with older grandkids isn’t always about finding activities to entertain them. Sometimes it’s about becoming part of the things they’re already doing.
Here are 10 ways we’ve found to make time together meaningful, even when everyone’s schedules are busy.
1. Show Up for Their Sporting Events and Activities
This has become one of the biggest ways we stay connected with our older grandkids.
Sports can take up entire weekends. Between practices, games, tournaments, and travel, there isn’t always much time left for traditional family get-togethers.
So we’ve learned to work around their schedules.
We don’t attend every game, but we make it to quite a few. Sometimes we’ll take the kids to lunch or dinner afterward. Other times, we’ll meet for breakfast before a game.
And occasionally, we’ll carve out time for a weeknight event.
It doesn’t have to be sports, either. School concerts, plays, art shows, and other activities are just as important.
Sometimes the best way to spend time with your grandkids is simply to show up and cheer them on.
2. Explore Your Own Backyard
Living near the southern Maine seacoast, we’re fortunate to have plenty of places to explore.
We enjoy hiking, visiting farmers markets, and sometimes doing the very things tourists come to our area to experience.
It’s funny how easy it is to overlook the interesting places right in your own backyard!
You don’t have to live in a tourist destination to make this work. Most communities have parks, walking trails, historical sites, local festivals, or interesting little towns worth exploring.
Let your older grandkids help choose where to go. You might discover somewhere new together.
And some of the best outings cost little or nothing.
3. Make Time for a Meal Together
Not every visit needs to be an all-day event.
Sometimes breakfast before a game or lunch afterward is the easiest way to spend time together.
Older kids are busy, and their schedules don’t always leave room for long visits. But an hour over breakfast or a casual dinner can be a wonderful opportunity to catch up.
It doesn’t have to be a restaurant, either. Homemade pizza, a favorite breakfast, or sandwiches after a hike can be just as enjoyable.
The important part is having time to talk and enjoy one another’s company.
4. Let Them Teach You Something
One of the nicest things about having older grandkids is watching them develop their own interests and talents.
Maybe they’re interested in basketball, running, gaming, music, art, or something you know absolutely nothing about.
Ask them to show you!
Let them teach you a card game, explain a favorite hobby, or demonstrate something they’ve been practicing.
You don’t have to become an expert. Showing genuine interest in something that’s important to them can mean a lot.
And who knows? You might discover a new interest of your own.
5. Take on a DIY Project Together
Older grandkids often enjoy projects that result in something they can actually use.
It could be painting a piece of furniture, building a simple shelf, making a garden planter, or helping decorate their bedroom.
You don’t need a workshop full of tools or years of experience.
In fact, figuring things out together can be part of the fun.
Let them help plan the project, choose the materials, and make decisions along the way.
They’ll gain some practical skills, and you’ll have something you created together.
6. Have a Cooking or Baking Challenge
Baking isn’t just for little kids!
With older grandkids, you can make things a little more interesting by turning cooking into a friendly challenge.
Try a homemade pizza competition, a cupcake-decorating contest, or a challenge to create a meal using ingredients already in the kitchen.
Let them choose recipes, make the shopping list, or plan dinner for the family.
It’s a fun way to spend time together while teaching useful skills.
And even if the finished product isn’t perfect, you’ll probably have a few laughs along the way.
7. Plan an Outdoor Adventure
Hiking is one of our favorite ways to spend time outdoors, but there are plenty of other possibilities.
Depending on where you live, you might try biking, kayaking, fishing, visiting a state park, or exploring a new walking trail.
Older grandkids can help plan the outing, choose the route, and figure out what supplies you’ll need.
The adventure doesn’t have to be difficult or expensive.
Sometimes a short hike followed by lunch is all you need for a really enjoyable day.
8. Have a Family Game Night
Games can still be a great way to connect with older kids—you may just need to change which games you’re playing.
Strategy games, card games, chess, and competitive board games can all be fun for tweens and teens.
You could organize a tournament, keep score over several games, or let everyone take turns choosing what to play.
If your grandchild enjoys something unfamiliar, such as a role-playing game, invite them to teach you.
Sometimes the best part is letting the kids take the lead.
9. Give Them a Say in the Plans
As grandchildren get older, they naturally want more independence.
Instead of deciding what everyone will do, ask for their input.
Give them a few choices or a reasonable budget and let them help plan an afternoon.
They might suggest a hike, a trip to a favorite restaurant, a sporting event, a local attraction, or something you never would have considered.
Giving them a voice in the plans makes the time together feel less like an obligation and more like something they genuinely want to do.
10. Be Flexible and Make the Little Moments Count
This may be the most important lesson we’ve learned.
Between raising our 9-year-old grandson, working, and keeping up with everyone’s schedules, we can’t always plan big family outings.
And our older grandkids have increasingly busy lives of their own.
So we try to be flexible.
Sometimes that means attending a Saturday morning game. Sometimes it’s a quick dinner afterward. Other times, it’s finding an evening during the week when everyone has a little free time.
We don’t always get as much time together as we’d like, but we make an effort to stay involved.
The goal isn’t to fill every available moment. It’s to make the moments we do have count.
Staying Connected as Grandkids Grow
As our grandchildren get older, our relationships with them naturally change.
They don’t need us to entertain them the way they did when they were little. They’re developing their own interests, friendships, and independence.
But I believe they still need to know we’re there.
Sometimes that means planning something special. Other times, it means sitting in the bleachers, taking a walk together, sharing a meal, or simply listening.
And for those of us who are raising grandchildren while also trying to stay connected with the rest of the family, flexibility becomes especially important.
We may not be able to do everything, but we can continue showing up in the ways that matter.
After all, being a grandparent isn’t just about the activities we plan.
It’s about the relationships we’re building and the memories we’re making along the way.
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The Practical Grandparent — Practical ideas, real-life experiences, and making memories with grandkids of every age.
